We are here!!!

So let me just start by saying Konnor is a freaking rockstar! I mean we couldn't have asked for him to do any better with all this travel.  Wednesday we stayed the night in San Fransisco.  Our second flight was delayed, then we got stuck on their version of the Metro for about 1 1/2 hr.  By the time we got to the hotel we were done.  We grabbed a cab to the wharf, got some seafood, konnor got a much deserved ice cream and we headed back to the hotel.  The next morning Konnor and I grabbed some food and swam while Mark finished up some school work.  Next stop was the airport!

This is where it gets kind of hairy.  Our initial flight was 1 1/2 hr delayed due to weather issues in China (lots of rain here the last few days).  That got us to Wuhan late (thankfully it was the same plane we were taking to Guangzhou so no worries about a missed flight).  Then once we cleared customs, checked back in for our connection and then they boarded us only for us to sit on the plane for 2 hrs before takeoff : (. It was 86 degrees when we got here at 2am.  Yuck!  Needless to say it was almost 4 am before we got to the hotel.  Konnor was awesome the whole trip with only one meltdown while waiting to clear customs in Wuhan.  Pretty sure they all wanted to know what kind of torture I was inflicting on the poor child because he was soooo over it.  He only slept on and off for a few hrs here and there on the plane.  He was also less than impressed with plane food and survived on my massive snack stash (we already had to go snack shopping today).  After about 26 hrs of nonstop travel we were all cranky so I don't blame him at all.  He only slept about 2 1/2 hrs before getting up for breakfast.  We walked to 7-11 to get snacks and then the last two days really caught up to Konnor.  I finally got him to sleep and we all took a much needed 4hr nap.  The rest of the day was just chill day.  Everyone felt better after nap.  Konnor and I swam for about an hour while Mark took a final and then we explored the hotel.  All my sensory parents will understand why we walked the stairs and escalators about a hundred times.  Matching games, coloring and books before our little guy passed out cold.  I am still in awe of how well he travelled the last few days.

We are getting the room arranged, and then tomorrow we are going to a local park.  I feel surprising good despite the jet lag.  Hoping we all sleep good tonight.  Only 2 more sleeps until we meet Owen!

The plane getting ready to take off

San Fransisco, Mark and Konnor with Alcatraz in the back ground

Getting settled in the hotel room

Room view

Leaving On A Jet Plane

It's almost midnight.  The alarm is set for 430 and by 530 we will be in the car and headed to St. Louis for the first leg of our journey.  The bags are packed including carry on's with only early morning essentials to throw in the bag.

Wow.  It's here.  I mean it's really here.  It feels like we have waited forever, 16 months, but all of a sudden the world started spinning faster and in a blink the last 2 months have flown by.  I am excited, scared, nervous, anxious and a million other things, but overall, I mean the real honest truth is that I feel a great calmness right now.  Right this minute all I have left to do is get on a plane.  The paperwork has been triple checked and it's time to go.  In 5 days I will be the Mother of 2, and while I know we have some tough days ahead, I know it's time.  God's time is always right.  So soon I will head to bed and get maybe a little sleep, but I wanted to touch on a few things first.

Nesting.  I wanted to talk about this in great detail and before midnight the night before we leave, but the last week has been a crazy, awesome mess : )  So here is a run down with some great sources to check into.  If you are family and plan on spending any time with us I HIGHLY recommend you review these sources.  If you are friends that plan on spending time with us please also do a quick run through to get an idea what we are talking about.  Owen has suffered great loss and trauma in his short life and the things we do to help him heal may seem out of the ordinary to you, but are essential to him.  We also have to assume that this adoption will trigger some issues with Konnor as well.  He is a very sensitive little guy, and we have to think ahead of ways to help him through this transition as well.


-We will be nesting when we get home.  No we will not be shut in our house 24/7, but we will limit our activities for at least the first few weeks to help everyone adjust to their new surroundings and schedules.

-We will not be allowing anyone to hold Owen for the immediate future.  There is no exact timeline on this as it is all dependent on his adjustment, but this is not negotiable.  He has had significant trauma with the loss of his birth family,  multiple hospitalizations, multiple caregivers and being taken from the only home he has ever known.  Konnor took to us right away, but there is no guarantee that Owen will react the same way so until such time as he shows signs of bonding to BOTH Mark and I we will not allow holding or self care to be done by anyone but us (feeding, diapers, baths, etc...).  You are welcome to talk to him, give fives, make silly faces, etc..., but please refrain from trying to take him from us and if he does reach for you please do not try to take him from our arms.  This is not meant to cause distress to anyone and it is not personal, but we have to do what is best for Owen and ultimately our family.  Please address questions to Mark or I regarding this issue.
Please please please read this article.  It is about perfect in explaining what I am talking about here.

www.https://thesweetfamilylife.wordpress.com/2014/01/10/a-letter-for-the-family-and-friends-of-those-adopting-a-little-one/

-Owen has burns on his right arm that are significant.  They don't hurt him and over time will get somewhat better, but will never completely heal. It is ok to talk about or ask questions about his burns.   It is a part of his history, but we don't want it to become the center of conversation everytime he meets someone so please try to plan ahead and talk to your children about what questions they may have and we are happy to help answer questions.   The Phoenix Society  http://www.phoenix-society.org  has some wonderful information about burns if anyone is interested in learning more.  

Alright everyone.  I know there is more, but honestly my alarm is going off in 4 hours and that is only if a 4 year old doesn't wake me up sooner.  Let me know if you have any questions and we will try to update as much as possible from China.

Mixed Emotions

We are only 5 days away from leaving and my emotions are all over the place.  Don't get me wrong, I am crazy excited, but there is more to it than just adding a little one to our family.  You see, the orphanage will already have been notified of Owen's impending adoption and his Gotcha Day.  This is huge in his world.  Any day now, if they haven't already, they will remove Owen from his Foster Family and place him back in the orphanage.  We have requested that they only do this a week prior, but truthfully we have no control over this and typically they do this about 2 weeks before Gotcha Day.  The reasoning is to create some distance between the child and the Foster Family so that they are more accepting of their Forever Family, but also they want the Nanny's to be the "bad guys" that remove the child versus the new family taking on that role.

My concerns are multiple on this issue:
I completely understand why they are doing this, but I hate hate hate to the core of my being that he will be back in the orphanage.  Firstly, he was moved to Foster Care due to the fact that he was failing to thrive in the orphanage.  This is one of the better orphanages, but still it is not a home with a Mommy to attend to all of his needs.  I worry about his eating (they have repeatedly told us he is not a good eater), I worry about his burns being taken care of, and on and on.

Mostly though my heart is breaking because I know his heart is breaking.  He has spent 8 months with this family.  They stayed with him during his hospitalization, burn care, etc... and from all accounts from parents whose children have fostered with them, they are amazing and love their foster children fiercely.  He is so little and has no way of knowing that this home is temporary.  In his mind this is Mama and Baba. I can only imagine how scared and confused he must be right now.  To then be in the orphanage and suddenly be handed to these people who look nothing like him, smell funny and talk funny is going to be just another trauma in his life.

So right now I ask that you say prayers for him.  That he will feel God's love surrounding him until we can be with him.  That his heart will be open to us and that our hearts and minds will be in tune to his needs during this upcoming transition.

Thank You

Whirlwind!!!!

Ahhhh!!! Ok so the last few days have been CRAZY!!!  We got our confirmed appt for the US Consult which means we will officially be meeting Owen for the first time on May 11!!  Less than 2 weeks from now!

  In the last few days we have planned our travel, booked flights, scheduled him for Cleft team, Pediatricians appt.'s and contacted his Burn team to start the process to get him scheduled there.  Seriously it is crazy around here!  Bags are starting to get packed and we officially are only 8 days aware from leaving!

Yesterday Konnor picked out a couple of the chunky cars he used to play with, the kind you pull back and they go across the floor.  He put them in Owen's suitcase and said he could have them b/c they are for little boys and he is a big boy now.  Oh melt this Mama's heart.  We are trying to prepare Konnor as best we can and as of now he is super excited about "going to bring Owen home."

In the coming days I am going to be posting a lot about cocooning and the why's of it after an adoption.  I talked about this with Konnor's adoption, but many do not understand why it is necessary and unfortunately there were relationships that were damaged due to lack of understanding.  Please remember that ultimately we will do what is best for our boys regardless of if it is understood, but we will try to pave the way so that people have a better grasp on the situation.  Thank you for your understanding on this topic.

8 days!!!!

Travel Approval!!!!!!!

We got our Travel Approval today!!!!  We have requested a May 11 Gotcha Day and should find out Monday morning if that is ok.  Once we have confirmation we just book flights and start packing!!!!! Ahhhhh!!!!!  Hang on tight b/c we are getting ready to hit warp speed with bringing Owen home!

A5 (for Realz)

Right now, right this very minute everyone's day is starting in China.  Our in China rep. will pick up our paperwork from the American Consulate (for real this time, we have a confirmed pickup date) and we will officially be waiting on Travel Approval!!  That means it will be time to book flights!!!  This will greatly help Mark and I's anxiety as we watch the flights fill up and prices go up : (  TA's have been coming in 3-5 days recently so fingers crossed we will have approval by Friday and we can start booking our travel.  EEEKKK!!!

I started packing for Owen today, and I think all I need is a swimsuit, some overnight diapers and more formula.  Bottles are getting washed tonight so I can throw them in the bag tomorrow and then Owen's packing is done (as well as incidentals that we won't need before we leave).  Soooo close!

Soooo close! and an Update!!

Our agency informed us that our paperwork will be picked up from the US Consulate on Monday 4/20.  YAY!!!!!  So by time we wake up on Monday we will officially be waiting on Travel Approval (for real this time : )  We are still looking like a May 11 Gotcha Day so Ahhh, it is so close!

We were able to ask some questions about Owen to help us get to know him a little before travel.  He is 18 lbs 11 oz now and 28 ish inches, so basically he is tiny little dude!  Apparently he is not a very good eater which I will have no idea what to do with since his brother can eat by the pound.  He is a pretty good sleeper.  He can walk just a few steps unassisted, but walks all over the place holding onto things.  He has a foster sister and is very close to his foster parents.  When I asked about his personality they said:  Busy and Active!  Haha!  He will fit right in at this house : )  I picked up some formula the Pediatrician wants him on yesterday, sorted all Konnor's under 12 months clothes and have started our packing pile.  It's getting REAL in here folks.  Overall we are getting really excited.  Konnor seems to still be really excited about Owen coming home and due to some daycare changes I will be able to keep both boys home with me for most of the summer to help with everyones adjustments.